Carpe F-ing Diem

When Dalai Lama was asked what surprised him the most; he said,

“Man, because he sacrifices his health in order to make money. Then he sacrifices money to recuperate his health. And then he is so anxious about the future that he does not enjoy the present; the result being that he does not live in the present or the future; he lives as if he is never going to die, and then he dies having never really lived.”

What would you get done that you are waiting to do because you think you will be here forever?  Do you remember all the things you wanted to do but never have done them?

I have many things.  I have a bucket list, in fact.  A bucket list of all things I want to do in life.  I didn't start checking things off until about two years ago.  Not to go into lengthy details, but all the years prior I spent wishing and waiting to do the things on that list.   Because of an incident, I learned a couple of things.  One of the most important is that, things can change almost instantaneously.  That scares me.  It makes me feel a sense of urgency to experience as many things as possible with the little life that I have.  To meet people that I have yet met before.  To cherish the relationships I have now.  To travel and see the world.  To [pardon the cliché] live life to the fullest.  

I have since tried to live in the moment - to be present.  It does not always work, as I am human, and I start to doubt myself and let fear dominates.  Although, I am getting progressively better with honing into the present. As a result,  I get a little bit more womanly balls [excuse the vulgarity] each and everyday. 

The reason why I am writing this is because I want to mark a decision of mine that have been finalized.  A decision that would entail me living for me. That soon, I will be taking off for 6 months to travel the world.  I hope my boss isn't reading this.  But if you are reading, boss, I'm giving you a year's notice.  (I do hope you'll give me a sabbatical or hire me once I get back *crying deep down in my soul*)  

I have a certain outlook in life.  That is to breathe as much as possible.  To breathe in good air.  I'll be breathing in good air for 6 months and will return to spread the good word.